Archive for the ‘Positivity’ Category

The Company You Keep

Wednesday, August 11th, 2010

Do you know someone who’s happiest when they’re unhappy?  Someone who can find something to complain about in every situation?

A few months ago, I met someone like this.  “Vivian” is a successful and accomplished woman, married to a nice man for over ten years.  Her children are grown, all healthy and self-sufficient.  On the outside looking in, she has a lovely life – until she speaks.  Everything pisses her off.  Everyone is stupid.  Nothing is as it should be.  Her motto:  Well, that’s just great.

Vivian and I got to know each other a bit, traveling in the same professional circles.  I find that in measured doses, I like her.  It amuses me to see how creative she can get – how far she will reach to turn something nice into crap.

Some examples:

  • When she couldn’t get a WiFi signal in the middle of an extravagant meal in a beautiful restaurant – “With the property taxes I pay, I should just stay home where I can get a damned signal.”
  • When she sneezed and someone said ‘bless you’ – “Well, somebody ought to.”
  • When looking at a beautiful sunset – “You know, it’s pollution that makes those vivid colors.”
  • When being congratulated on her tenth wedding anniversary – “Yeah, the prenup finally expired”

Wow.

At first I thought that perhaps she was going through a tough time.  But now I believe that she chooses unhappiness. She works hard to maintain it.  She is more fortunate than most, but she wants to see only dark clouds.  There is no making her happy.  All of this would be fine and dandy.  Do whatever you like.  But her attitude is toxic.  After ½ hour or so, I have to get away from her and join the ranks of other people who are avoiding her.  Her negativity is heavy.  Her barrage of complaints make me tired and make my joints ache.  She is cancerous to a conversation.  If you’re not paying close attention, you will find yourself drawn into complaining about your life too.  Having a nice day?  Here, let me kill it for you.

So like many others before me, I will be polite, but for my own (sometimes fragile) well-being, I will hold her at arm’s length.  And I will feel sad for her.

Without Complaint

Monday, July 19th, 2010

G is a very wordly and mature six years old.  While his brain is soaking in volumes of knowledge, I, his annoying mother, am tring to squeeze in two more lessons these days.  1.) Chew with your mouth closed.  We had this down, but evidently when you turn six, manners and volume control go right out the window, so we’re starting over and 2.)  Stop complaining.

I’ve always had a low tolerance threshold for whining, but lately I hear myself telling his to stop complaining more and more often.  If we go to the zoo, he gets upset that we didn’t go to McDonalds after.  He got a new pair of shoes and they weren’t the ones he wanted from the commercial.  He complains about meals before he even knows what I’m putting on his plate.  I point out his many blessings.  And generally, he really is a very good-natured kid.  But he’s moody lately – we’re assuming it’s a phase.

This weekend, after a typically busy Saturday, I was worn out.  Over dinner, I told Willis about how I had done three hampers of laundry, picked up a million toys and run a bunch of errands, all so that everything was all set for me to “go to work” Monday morning.  If I work all week and work harder on the weekends, no wonder I’m tired.  And from his sweet angel face at the end of the dinner table came the words, “Mommy, you should stop complaining.”

Damn.  He was absolutely right (which made me want to smack him, but I suppressed the urge).  Here I was in my beautiful house with my beautiful family eating a beautiful meal.  And I was spending it complaining.  It makes sense that you can’t be grateful for what you have if you’re too busy focusing of what you lack.

So my little smart-mouthed genius and I made a deal.  We both promised to try to go the entire next day without a single complaint.  And we will begin each dinner with everyone telling three things that they’re grateful for today.

Perhaps this will help to clean up both of our attitudes.

Graduation

Friday, May 28th, 2010

Lemons:
Five minutes after my husband tells me he’s going to be out of town next week, I read the flier announcing the kindergarten graduation ceremony.  Kindergarten graduation?!  Come on!  Can’t the school year just end?  Now I have to find a sitter for the baby, go and socialize with the PTA moms, most of whom I don’t care for at all and sit through this nonsensical waste of my precious time all for something my kid doesn’t care about and won’t remember any way.

Lemonade:
This is an opportunity for my mom to spend some alone time with Pinky while I’m out.  The school is good about keeping these things short and sweet so we’ll get in and out and then I’ll take my sweet boy out for dinner, just the two of us.  How often do I get the chance to buy him an ice cream cone and tell him how proud I am of him?

Paying It Forward

Wednesday, May 26th, 2010

A hundred years ago when I was waiting tables for a living, it only took one really good tip to make my whole night a good one.  Likewise, it only took one jerk to ruin a shift.  Isn’t it amazing how it really takes so little to make or break your mood?  One compliment brightens your day and one insult destroys it.

If it takes so little positive energy to have such a large impact, imagine what you could do with an intention of purposefully spread joy?  Try it as an experiment today.  Tell someone that color looks great on them.  Or thank someone who isn’t expecting it.  Wish someone good luck.  Do an act of kindness.  Watch how the other person reacts.  Then notice how it made you feel.

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”   – Mark Twain

PS – Did I mention that you look incredible today?

Silver Lining

Wednesday, May 19th, 2010

See all this water? It's mine.

Holy buckets was this an expensive weekend.  First, the lawnmower died.  Kaching.  Then the TV, with a row of buttons exactly at the level of Pinky’s face, got so full of baby spit that it stopped producing sound.  (Those buttons would feel funny on your tongue now that I think about it.)  Kaching.  Then I got a call from Willis at the office Monday morning.  There was water pouring into the alley that runs alongside our house from a pipe that we apparently own.  Upon inspection by a utility crew, we were told that the antique lead pipe between the house and the water main finally gave out after the 100th hard winter.  KACHING!  Evidently I can spend thousands of dollars simply by staying home and folding laundry.

My first reaction was a knot in my stomach that only money issues can cause.  I used to get it all the time when we were newlywed, poverty-stricken grad students.  Then I uttered a few choice words that I never want my children to say.  But after a minute I said to myself, “OK.  It is what it is.  You can only control how you handle it.”  Deep breath.  Find a silver lining.

  1. Water could have poured into the house, but it didn’t.
  2. This could have happened in the winter and been a frozen mess, but it didn’t.
  3. This happened on a day when Willis was in town and home from work.  He’s scheduled to travel the next several weeks.  But he’s here now, handling it.
  4. We’ll be getting rid of the old lead pipes which are probably stunting the children’s growth.
  5. My water pressure will most likely be improving.
  6. This is a financial hit.  But we are more able to absorb it now than at most points in our past.
  7. There is a newer water main closer to the house than the old one we’re currently on, so this repair will be cheaper than if we had to keep our current connection.
  8. It is all going to be fine.  Because I’ve decided that it is.

So the pit in my stomach has subsided.  As long as the car doesn’t start making any crazy noises, it may shape up to be a pretty nice week.

A No Good Very Bad Day

Friday, May 7th, 2010

I am a huge Oscar fan.

It’s been a tough week.  Not for any big reason, but a bunch of little reasons ganged up on me – any one of which would be insignificant.  Anyway, I feel tired and overwhelmed and taken for granted and generally like poo.

I’ve been blogging about joy for a while now, so I know just what I should do.  I should take a deep breath and think about the many, many things in my life for which I am grateful.  I should stretch my body and take a vitamin.  I should hug my beautiful babies and kiss my handsome husband.  I should take a walk in the sunshine and smile and feel happy.  But I don’t want to do any of that because I feel like poo.

I don’t want balance and serenity and happiness to become yet another unrealistic ideal to which I compare myself.  So I’m going to allow myself this poo day.  I choose to muck around in my grumpiness for a bit.  I feel bad and I don’t want to feel bad about that.

So, I resolve to not be crabby at anyone else – I’ll lay low today.  And I will endeavor not to smother my troubles with carbohydrates – though the urge is very strong.  And tomorrow will be a new day.  In the mean time, I wish a very happy poo day to you.

How To Think Positively When You Feel Terrible

Monday, April 19th, 2010

I’m working hard to improve my outlook and to claim the joy in my life.  I’ve learned the amazing power of my thoughts to make the difference between surviving and thriving.  It’s a wonderful journey I’m on and I love blogging about it.  But some days, I’m not feeling it.  Those of you who know me may be shocked (shocked!) to know that sometimes, I’m crabby.

My predicament then is how do I write authentically about demanding joy in my life when I’m feeling anything but joyful?  Here’s what I’ve come up with:

How to De-Crabbify

  • Take a deep breath.  Or ten.  Focusing on your breathing clears your mind and calms your nerves.
  • Smile.  It’s hard to stay grumpy when you’re smiling.
  • Move your body.  Have a good stretch.  Get your blood moving.
  • Determine what, specifically your problem is.  For me, sometimes I have a legitimate and tangible reason for feeling down.  Sometimes not.  It’s helpful to know the difference.
  • Do something joyful.  Play basketball with a balled-up sock.  Eat an Oreo (no more than 3).  Listen to your favorite song.  Think about the little things in life that make you happy.  Then do them!
  • Focus on gratitude.  Counting your blessings – literally – puts things into the proper perspective.
  • Make someone else happy.  Tell a kid a knock knock joke.  Give someone a compliment.  Offer your husband a quickie.  Good all around.
  • Fake it ‘til you make it.  Feelings follow behavior.  So if you act happy, you’ll feel happy.
  • Don’t force it.  It’s OK to have a down day.  Anyone who’s happy all the time is not to be trusted.

Any other suggestions for kick starting positivity?

Changing the Subject

Friday, April 2nd, 2010

People tend to tell me things.  Often very personal things.  So many times someone has confided in me something so personal that I’ll think, “Wow.  I don’t really know you that well, but OK.”  I take it as a compliment that they think I am both compassionate and trustworthy.  My office has always been the one where people come to vent.  The kleenex is always ready.  Being the go-to person means that some incredible information comes my way.  99% of it I keep to myself.

Unfortunately I worked in a putrid and toxic environment so my “venting office” was a busy place.  Long story short, I quit.  I willingly took a significant step down in my career in pursuit of a better quality of life.  And it was completely worth it.  I am calmer and much happier.  I now work in a much more humane office.

The problem is that all of my friends from my old job still want to call me up or meet for coffee to vent.  I’m happy to maintain these relationships, but now that I escaped, I don’t feel as good about commiserating.  I truly don’t care about the latest gossip or the most recent evil thing that senior management has done.  I want to focus on my new happy life and my gratitude for all of the changes I’ve been able to make this past year.

So today, I drew a line in the sand.  Halfway through lunch with a former co-worker, I changed the subject.  “Let’s not talk about work any more.  How are your kids?”  He was dumbfounded.  The rest of the meal was a little awkward and although he didn’t say it outright, I got the message – “If we’re not going to bitch about the department, then what are we doing here?!”  Perhaps I burned a bridge.  But it’s a bridge to a place I never want to go again.

50 Lists to Write to Lift Your Spirits

Monday, March 22nd, 2010

As a structural thinker, I love to make lists.  Getting everything out of my head and down on paper in an orderly fashion puts me at ease.  Rather than grocery lists and to-do lists, try some of these.  They’re sort of an inventory of your life and all the good things in it.  If your brain is more creative, your lists can be graphical or in the form of a mind map – whatever speaks to you.  This is a brainstorming activity, so list as many as you can without editing or limiting yourself.  There are no wrong answers – this is for you and about you.  Enjoy!

List as many as you can:

  1. People who have influenced or inspired you
  2. Things you are grateful for
  3. Places you have been
  4. Places you want to go
  5. Books you’ve read
  6. Your favorite things – what brings you joy?
  7. Good things that happened this week
  8. The best things that happened in the last year
  9. The best days of your life.
  10. The songs for the soundtrack of your life
  11. Acts of kindness you’ve committed
  12. Things you want your children to know about you
  13. Reasons why you love your significant other
  14. The high points for your autobiography
  15. People who love you
  16. The cutest things your kids ever said
  17. Everything you would do if money were no object
  18. Favorite gifts you’ve ever received
  19. Favorite gifts you’ve ever given
  20. Occupations that you have ever wanted to have (including when you were a child)
  21. The best advice you’ve gotten.
  22. The worst advice you’ve gotten.
  23. Things you’re procrastinating
  24. Ways you calm yourself down when you’re angry.
  25. The best ideas you’ve ever had
  26. The best projects or organizations you’ve ever been involved with
  27. The ways you have grown since your early 20’s
  28. The most beautiful things you’ve ever seen
  29. The greatest lessons you have learned
  30. Life’s lessons that you learned the hard way
  31. Things that have mad you laugh until you cried.
  32. Qualities you most admire in others
  33. Qualities others most admire in you
  34. The elements of an ideal year
  35. All the compliments you’ve ever gotten
  36. Foods that you have eaten that are so good that others could hear you enjoying them
  37. The times you have asserted yourself
  38. Things that inspire and energize you
  39. The places where you feel completely comfortable to be yourself
  40. The most important turning points in your life
  41. Times when you looked and felt your absolute best
  42. The things you’re good at
  43. What you would do with the power of invisibility
  44. Things you want to teach your children
  45. Things you still want to do in life
  46. Bits of trivia that most people don’t know about you
  47. The things you love about your body
  48. Accomplishments you are most proud of
  49. The things you love about your home
  50. Who (living or dead) you would invite to your dream dinner party

100 Ways to Nurture Yourself

Monday, March 8th, 2010

Probably the most important component to demanding your joy is learning to take excellent care of yourself – mind, body, and spirit.  Think of caring for yourself as if you were your own child – giving to yourself at least as much as you give to others.  You are worth it!

Like joy itself, self-nurturing comes in many little bits.  Here are 100 of those bits for your consideration.  This is not a checklist – only a list of suggestions.  Please take the ones that speak to you and ignore the rest.  Enjoy!

  1. Put a post-it on your mirror that says, “You look beautiful!” – and then accept the compliment every time you look at yourself.
  2. Buy fresh flowers every now and then. – Brighten up the place.
  3. Used colored pens for no particular reason. – Blue and black are fine, but how about orange?
  4. Take a walk without a destination. – It’s a great way to get some exercise and clear your mind.  Be mindful of what you see, hear and feel.
  5. Take a hot bath. – With bubbles.
  6. Write in a journal. – Write anything that calls you.  Ideas, experiences, dreams, frustrations – get them out of your head and down on paper.
  7. List the things that you’re grateful for. – You can’t help but feel better when you literally count your blessings.
  8. List the things that you like about yourself. – We can all list the things that we don’t like about ourselves.  Turn that around and think about your many positive qualities.
  9. Create something. – Many of us have gotten away from actually making things.  Create some artwork.  Write something.  Build something.  Make something that didn’t exist before.  It can be functional or frivolous – as long as you enjoy the process.
  10. Treat yourself. – We struggle to be disciplined, especially with money and food.  You deserve a reward, right?
  11. Smile. – It’s very difficult to feel bad when your face is happy.
  12. Squash negative thoughts. – Listen to what’s going on in your head and actively quiet the voices of pessimists and critics.  Assume the best, not the worst.
  13. Try something new. – Go out on a limb.  Learn something new.  Do that thing you’ve always wanted to try.  The more experiences you have, the richer your life will be.
  14. Get enough sleep. – Everything is hard when you’re tired.
  15. Meditate. – It takes a little practice at first, but if you find a meditation that works for you, you will be calmer and more peaceful.
  16. Drink plenty of water. – It’s basic, but it’s so good for you.
  17. Stretch. – Before you start your day, take a few minutes for a good muscle stretch.  It just plain feels good.  And, it’s fast, easy and free.
  18. Put some “me time” on your calendar. – When life gets busy, doing things for yourself is the first thing to be sacrificed.  So, actually block out time on your calendar.  Call it a ‘staff meeting’ or something so that no one intrudes on your time.
  19. Call a friend. – Think of someone who you enjoy and ring them up!
  20. Ask for help. – This can be hard.  But it’s so important to recognize when you need a sounding board, or some advice, or an extra pair of hands.
  21. Say no. – Your time is valuable.  Set boundaries to avoid becoming overwhelmed.
  22. Ask for a hug. – We all need one.  So just go get one.  The person you ask probably needs one too.
  23. Delegate. – Hire someone to mow the lawn or scrub the floors.  Teach the kids to do laundry.  Give that project to a co-worker.  You do not have to do it all.
  24. Take a deep breath. – And another.  Now another.  It’s like a mini-break to reset yourself during the day.
  25. Light a candle or use a reed diffuser. – Your sense of smell creates the strongest memories.  Find scents you love and enjoy them.
  26. Claim some space for yourself. – A place where you can go to have a quiet moment to read a book, or meditate, or cry – somewhere that you can get some peace and privacy.
  27. Get out into nature. – Reconnecting with the earth is just good for your soul. Feel the breeze.  Breathe the fresh air.  So good!
  28. Buy the good ice cream. – Even on the tightest of budgets, this is important.
  29. Use lotions & soaps with scents that you love. – It’s a nice way to pamper yourself, plus you’ll smell good all day.
  30. Give a compliment. – Telling someone that they had a fantastic idea or that they look beautiful in that color creates a pleasant environment and makes two people feel good for the price of one.
  31. Listen to music. – Listen to whatever makes you happy.  Can you be grumpy while listening to Gloria Gaynor?  I think not.
  32. Play. – Something we forget as adults.  A board game, a sport, finger painting – find something frivolous and have fun!
  33. Eat foods that you love. – Low fat, low calorie, low carb – blah, blah, blah.  Food is to be enjoyed!  Put food into your body that nourishes you in every way.
  34. Be silly every now and again. – We take ourselves entirely too seriously.  Let go.  Be spontaneous and outrageous!
  35. Laugh. – Sometimes you just need a good laugh to lift your spirits.
  36. Limit screen time. – Too much time in front of computers, TV’s, video games, and blackberries (or all of the above) disconnects you from the world immediately around you and makes your brain mushy.  Make sure that you’re getting plenty of input from the non-virtual world.
  37. Be present. – Be deliberate about experiencing what’s happening right now.  It’s all about the journey – don’t miss yours!
  38. Stop worrying. – It’s going to be fine.  Because it is.
  39. Trust yourself. – You are smart, capable and talented.  You’re choices are just as valid as anyone else’s.  Don’t second guess yourself.
  40. Do something that’s only for you. – Remember that hobby that you used to have time for?  Or that food that no one else in your house likes?  Reclaim it.
  41. Make sure your health is in order. – What’s more important than your health?  See your doctor regularly.  Make sure you are getting the vitamins or supplements that you need.  Advocate for yourself as you would for your child.
  42. Give to someone in need. – Donating your time or your stuff or your money to someone less fortunate makes you feel good and puts your problems into perspective.
  43. Sparkle! – Feeling schlumpy?  Get all dolled up. Wear something schmancy.  It’s a good way to find your strut.
  44. Dance. – It’s inherently joyful.  You can’t be sad if you’re dancing!
  45. Write your own rock star introduction. – Image you’re on tour with thousands of screaming fans.  How will you be introduced?  “Please welcome the brilliant, the amazing, the gorgeous….you!”
  46. Stand up for yourself. – Your needs are important.  Don’t let anyone disregard them.  Pushing back can be scary but it’s empowering too!
  47. Celebrate! (for any reason at all) – Your kid learned to tie his shoes!  Your taxes are done and filed!  The week is more than half over!  Let’s party!
  48. Find a mantra or an affirmation that lifts your spirits. – “Today is a new day.” “I know that life always supports me.” “I get everything that I want.”  Find one that works for you.
  49. Stand tall. – Your spirit can’t soar when you slouch.  You feel much more powerful when you stand up straight and look the world in the eye.
  50. Have sex. – What can I say?  It feels good.
  51. Get a massage. – What can I say?  It feels good.
  52. Choose optimism. – Thinking positive thoughts has a tangible impact on your day and on your life.
  53. Dream big. – You can do anything you set your mind to!
  54. Tune out the naysayers. – People criticize for many reasons, most of which have nothing to do with you.  Follow your heart – not everyone has to get it.
  55. Add color to your surroundings. – Beiges and taupes are pervasive these days.  Depressing.  Make sure that you introduce energetic colors where you work and where you live.
  56. Surround yourself with the things you love. – Photos of loved ones or mementos that bring happy memories.  You should have the stuff that you love all around you.
  57. Declutter. – You should have ONLY the stuff that you love.  Purge everything in your life, both physical and emotional that you don’t honestly need, use or love.  Everything else distracts you from your true intentions and bogs you down.
  58. Stop procrastinating. – Procrastination is a form of perfectionism.  Accept that it’s not going to be perfect and just get it over with.  Image how great it will feel to not have it hanging over your head any more!
  59. Listen to your inner voice. – Your instincts are good.  It’s important to listen to your own head and heart.
  60. Cut yourself some slack. – Arguably the most important tip on this list.  We hold ourselves to impossible standards and then beat ourselves up when we don’t meet them.  Would you be this hard on anyone else?
  61. Slow down. – When you’re living your life at top speed, you’re missing most of it.  Stop and take a breath.  Look for ways to adopt a more humane pace.
  62. Identify your passion. – What do you love?  Do you have a non-profit organization that you feel passionate about?  Are you passionate about water polo?  How about 14th century Portuguese literature?  Find something in your life that really floats your boat.
  63. Toot your own horn. – You’re awesome.  Please make sure that everyone knows it.
  64. Move your body. – Run and jump and climb a tree.  Take a tap dancing class.  Power walk.  Anything that feels good that gets your blood moving.  The only limitation:  it has to be fun.  Don’t get on a treadmill if you hate the treadmill.
  65. Invest in really good bras. – This one is gender-specific, obviously.  You feel much better about yourself when you’re hoisted up properly.  So stand tall and salute the sun ladies!
  66. Purge things that aren’t good for you. – Unhealthy foods, cigarettes, a miserable work environment, toxic people – do what you have to do to set boundaries and demand the highest quality of life.  You deserve it.  Things that don’t nourish and support you – think about how you might be rid of them.
  67. Limit your news consumption. – It’s important to be well-informed, but the non-stop feed of earthquakes and plane crashes and economic crisis and war is not good for us.  Be deliberate in finding a balance that’s best for you.  Once you’ve seen today’s news cycle, turn it off.
  68. Say yes to life. – Opportunities are everywhere.  Take a class, join a team, go bungee jumping.  When new things present themselves to you – jump at the chance.
  69. Stop hating your body. – If the women of the world took all of the time, energy and money that we spend on hating our bodies and turned it towards something productive, there would be no war, poverty or disease left on the planet.  Your body is your body.  Nobody’s looking at your physical flaws because they’re all too busy trying to hide their own.  Let’s give ourselves a break and let it go.
  70. Sing loudly. – in the shower and the care and anywhere else you like.  With reckless abandon.
  71. Be kind. – Being nice to someone else.  You will have made the world a better place.  What feels better than that?
  72. Tell someone you love them. – We often forget to say it out loud.  It matters.
  73. Take all of your vacation days. – You earned them.  Don’t give them back to your company for nothing.
  74. Play hooky. – Call in sick once in awhile when you’re not sick.  Use the day to pamper yourself (not to catch up on errands or housework).
  75. Take pride in the hard times that you have overcome. – What didn’t kill you made you stronger.  It wasn’t easy, but you did it!
  76. Let someone else be in charge for a while. – Other people can be responsible while you do something for yourself.
  77. Don’t answer the phone unless it’s someone you want to talk to right now. – Some people find it difficult not to answer a ringing phone, but it’s liberating once you learn to ignore it or even better, just turn it off.
  78. Have faith. – It’s going to work out.  The future is bright!
  79. Take a personal inventory. – Does your behavior match your true intentions?  If there’s a disconnect, you’re carrying a heavy weight.
  80. Go on a retreat. – For a couple of minutes or a couple of days, get away for a bit to re-energize.
  81. Put your finances in order. – Money problems are enormously stressful.  Paying off debt where possible, putting bills on automatic payment, and working with a financial planner if necessary can all help to ease the strain.
  82. Eliminate all expectations of perfection. – In fact, eliminate the word ‘perfect’ from your vocabulary.  If you expect yourself to be perfect, you will never stop beating yourself up.
  83. Find a good way to blow off steam. – Bottling it up indefinitely will probably end badly.
  84. Be who you are. – your authentic, true self.
  85. Spend some time alone for quiet reflection. – We spend all of our time go, go, going.  Try stopping to think about your life, your goals, and your dreams.
  86. Keep your words positive. – Happiness and complaints cannot coexist.
  87. Let light and fresh air into your house. – Sunlight is a must.  Open up those windows!
  88. Turn off your e-mail, cell phone, blackberry, fax, etc. for a while. – It’s not healthy to be accessible 24/7.
  89. Pare down your to-do list. – Feeling overwhelmed?  What’s on your list that can be delegated, avoided, or jettisoned?
  90. Avoid boredom. – Keep your brain active to keep the blues at bay.
  91. Make your home a haven. – Your home should be a place where you can take a breath and really relax.  If it isn’t, you may have some work to do.
  92. Be stingy with your time and energy. – Both are precious and should be spent on things that really matter to you.
  93. Let go. – 80% of everything is irrelevant.  Focus on the other 20.
  94. Minimize multi-tasking. – Yeah, women are supposed to be good at it, but that doesn’t make it good for us.
  95. Break your routine once in awhile. – Get out of a rut and into a groove.
  96. Take action! – If something isn’t right in your life, fix it!
  97. Plan ahead. – With a few minutes of organizing your time and to-do’s, you will be better prepared to take on the day.
  98. Intentionally enjoy your journey. – As you go through your days, look around.  Be present with what you see, hear and feel.  You might be amazed at what you’ve been missing.
  99. Spend time with people who make you happy. – Who nourishes and supports you?  Surround yourself with those people.
  100. Enjoy your kids. – It’s easy to rush through the day without really connecting with them.  Make a conscious effort to talk with them about their day.
  101. Avoid self-deprivation. – When it comes to food, it’s OK to cut back on things that aren’t good for you (sweet, sweet carbohydrates), but if you feel deprived, it’s probably not maintainable, creating a vicious circle of cheating and guilt.
  102. Forget the word “should”. – Instead of doing what you think you’re supposed to, follow your own path.
  103. Pay attention to your energy. – Are you most productive first thing in the morning?  Are you sluggish after lunch?  Honor your natural cycles and plan accordingly.

OK, that’s more than 100.  I got carried away.

Here are a couple of books I recommend that helped me to nurture myself when I was feeling less than inspired:

Stand Up for Your Life
You Can Heal Your Life
Choose Them Wisely:  Thoughts Become Things